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Getting to the Airport in Style

Getting to the Airport in Style

By Nick Jurkowski

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Everyone wants to get to the airport without having to drive themselves. Naturally, navigating the fiendishly circuitous routes of airport streets only to have to park in long-term parking (and pay exorbitant prices for the privilege) is not most peoples' idea of a good time. There are a few alternatives. One of the most popular is the airport shuttle service.

The airport shuttle can seem an attractive offer. It's usually about twenty dollars, and they pick you up at or near your house. The problem, as I see it, is that you have to leave even further in advance than you would normally, and you have to stop at many others' homes along the way. I find that the crowded nature of these vans (combined with the smooth jazz music they play incessantly) only serves to add to the stress of traveling, and that in general, they aren't worth the 20 dollars their service costs. What alternative would I recommend?

While I wouldn't necessarily advocate always renting a limo (unless you are fabulously wealthy and enjoy luxury), I would recommend it to everyone for their more "special" trips. There is no better way than to kick off a vacation than climbing in a luxury vehicle and not worrying about airport traffic. Millenium offers very competitive prices, and (depending on how far away you live from the airport), I'd expect to pay 50-75 dollars for the whole trip. It's an even better idea to give Millenium a call if you are coming to the Miami airport for a vacation. There's nothing harder than trying to negotiate an unfamiliar city after a long flight.

Hopefully this gives you some idea of why I believe that limos are better deals for your dollar than airport shuttles. Keep Millenium in mind for an special trips you have planned, into or out of – Miami.

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Sonar Club: South Beach

Sonar Club: South Beach

By Nick Jurkowski

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Sonar is an interesting little club that can be just the thing: a vision of the world of the future – of someone living in 1965. Imagine the sort of nightclub the Jetsons might frequent: lots of plastic domes housing bric-a-brac and hourglass-shaped seats are effective in creating a unified vision.

There is no cover, so naturally the drinks are a bit expensive. Still, 7 dollars a drink is reasonable for such an establishment (however, the drinks are a bit weak for my taste). The music largely depends on the "theme" of the night, and is an eclectic mix, ranging from house to techno and new wave. Sonar occasionally closes early if the crowd isn't particularly big, but most of the time it's open well into the wee hours of the morning.


Overall, the mood of this club is decidedly more laid-back and low-key than many others, especially those in the South Beach area. The dress code is not quite so draconian as many clubs (t-shirt and jeans are just fine) and the music quiet enough to carry on a conversation. The club tries to be simultaneously– glamorous, hip, and underground, but manages to pull it off either way.

If you want a turbo-charged club scene full of yuppie twenty-somethings in expensive clothes grinding to soul-shatteringly loud dance music, Sonar is not where you should go. If, however, you feel like going to a fun club with a less intense atmosphere that seems to change it's personality nightly, keep Sonar in mind.


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Crobar review

Crobar review

By Nick Jurkowski

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As you all well know, South Beach is one of the nightclub capitals of the world. It's always fun to visit the quintessential Miami Beach nightclubs - those that have been around for a little while and continue to be popular, reminding us of why South Beach is too expensive and we should just go to Fort Lauderdale instead (not really...but kind of). One such classic South Beach nightclubs is Crobar.

In the topsy-turvy Miami club world, on one day a club owner will find his venue to be the most popular in town, and on the next day, he'll be burning the club down for the insurance money. This makes the fact that Crobar has been an incredibly popular club for years all the more impressive a feat. Clearly, Crobar must have something going for it.

The overall appeal of Crobar is that it doesn't rely on kitschy themes to catch the eye of the fickle South Beach club-goers; the secret to its longevity. It is everything you think of when you think of a Miami Beach nightclub, offering three rooms, all of which are decorated in very different, effective themes. There is also a glassed-off VIP area that will cost you an arm an a leg to get into, but if you feel like splurging, it's well worth it. Their DJs play a standard club fare of house and hip-hop, but the music never gets tiresome and always fit's the atmosphere.

Being in Crobar for a night is a wonderful sensory overload, between the thumping music, lavish club décor, scantily clad patrons, and the sights, sounds, and smells relating thereto. When you want a fantastic, solid Miami nightclub that has stood the test of time, check out Crobar.

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Top 10 Things to Bring on a Limo

Top Ten Things to Bring on Your Limousine Adventure

By Nick Jurkowski

When riding in a limo, you may be confused on what to bring. Should you bring a camera, should you bring a CD player, should you bring the kitchen sink? Should you pack a suitcase or just wrap things up in a bandana and tie them to the end of a stick? There's a lot to wonder about, but ride assured: when using a limo, you only need a few things...

10. A plan of what you want to do (even if it's just a drive around in a limousine for 2 hours).

9. Alcohol, if that's your plan. We'll provide mixers, water, and ice, but for anything else, you'll regrettably have to supply your own.

8. Friends. While there is something to be said for the shadowy loner who travels only by limo, generally speaking, you will have a much better time if you are in a group

7. Plenty of canned food, you never know when Armageddon will strike; you're just as likely to be in a limousine as anywhere else.

6. At least a passing understanding of the laws of the land and community decency standards.

5. Large numbers of one-dollar bills for trinkets and baubles.

4. Parachute pants. They're coming back.

3. Disguises of fake mustaches, wigs, and so forth. The need for these will become all too apparent.

2. A cyanide capsule.

1. A desire to have some good clean fun.



Top 10 Things to See from a Limo

The Top 10 Things to See From a Limo

By Nick Jurkowski

Like rose-colored glasses, limousine windows strongly affect your perception of the world outside. The once ordinary avenues, boulevards, and occasional instance of street crime become somehow magical as your entire basis for perception shifts. Keeping that in mind, I have included here a list of sights to see (if you can) while riding in style and comfort in a Millenium Limousine. Without further ado:

# The awe and respect of your peers.
# Your ex-husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend – in the rearview mirror.
# The futile curses and carryings on of your enemies.
# Horsies.
# Street crime in the less affluent sections of Miami. Don't worry; you're in your impenetrable hummer limo.
# The beautiful creatures of the sea.
# The lights and attractions of Miami's peerless nightlife.
# The lights and attractions of Ft. Lauderdale's adequate nightlife.
# All the maroons stuck in traffic.
# The inferiority of everything else when compared to the majesty of your limousine.

Once you have beheld these scenes from a limousine, you will never want to go back to viewing them the way you did before. Things will never seem the same, and you will embark on a long quest to be able to percieve things as you onece did. This quest will inevitably lead to another Millenium Limo.


Microstates Continued: San Marino

If you love anachronistic Italian city-states and crossbows, then you'll love San Marino. Even though it is a small country (hence, "microstate") San Marino has a rich history, and was admired by both Napolean and Abraham Lincoln. In addition to it being (possibly) the oldest surviving democracy, its citizens are very civic-minded, and their voter turnout is around 99%, so you just know it has to be a party-town.

San Marino is built on Mount Titano in northern Italy. It is really only one city, the most popular part of which is its Old Town, which is essentially renn-fest fan's dream. Carless, flagstone paths lead past limestone buildings and sunken crossbow pitches. Visit the historic forts that surround the city (which have made its independence possible), and the museums therein, some of which house prodigious numbers of ancient weaponry (including a sizable crossbow collection.) Wandering around the forts themselves is a good time, as almost everything is accessible – you can climb up small metal ladders or stone steps and take a stroll along the parapets.

In spite of all this history, one of the most interesting things about San Marino is its present. The fact that the country exists today is a testament to its forward thinking citizenry, who really care about their tiny country – and if you are at all interested in how politics works in such a tiny place, the locals love to talk at length about it.

As far as fun things to do that don't involve politics or old weaponry, they have a great wax museum and reptiliean aquarium (bound to be a hit with the kids), and check out the Ristorante Righi for food and drinks.

Next time: Andorra


Andorra - DISCOVERED

Surprisingly, Andorra is not a witchy mother-in-law, but a tiny country wedged in the Eastern Pyrenees between Spain and France. It is notable for having the highest life-expectancy in the world, as well as being one bastions of the Catalan language, which some consider the bridge between the Gallo-Romance languages like French and the Iberian Romance languages like Spanish. So it has that going for it.
In addition to being a notorious tax haven, The Principality of Andorra is popular with tourists of many nationalities. Local lore has it that all Andorrans can speak Catalan, Spanish, and French, but there are many who can't speak much of the latter; monoglots beware: in my experience, almost no one speaks English.

There are a lot of reasons to visit Andorra. A popular one for Europeans is that country not a member of the European Union, and so can sell all manner of alcohol and tobacco duty-free. In addition to cheap booze, Andorra is known for its strategic location in the Pyrenees, which makes it a hotspot for skiing and snowboarding. There are several ski-resorts, many of which have gentler slopes than those found in the rest of Europe, which makes them popular with novices, families, and wimps.

Andorra's capitol, Andorra la Vella, is quaint but cosmopolitan. Most villages and cities in Andorra have an annual "Village Festival," where they celebrate their heritage with music, feasting, and dancing, and Andorra La Vella is no different. These festivals are generally held between July and September, and Andorra la Vella's is held the first weekend in August, and lasts three days. Festivals like this are great for soaking in local culture, as well as Andorra's unique cuisine – a mixture of French and Catalan with a large helping of pasta on the side.

Andorra is more than just a quaint historical curiosity – it's a lot of fun to visit with a lot to offer. Between the skiing and the village festivals, you'll find enough to keep you occupied for as long as you want to stay, and you'll still come back for more.

Next up: Liechtenstein


Hidden Liechtenstein

Liechtenstein, one of two doubly landlocked countries in the world, is known as a winter sports haven because of its location: wedged between Switzerland and Austria. If you've ever wanted to go down professionally-groomed toboggan runs, then Liechtenstein is the principality for you.

Like many microstates, Liechtenstein has a very visible sense of its own history. Because of its history of affluent aristocrats, you will find tons of private and public art galleries in Liechtenstein that features some truly amazing works by artists like Picasso, Beuys, and Moore, and museums host annual expositions to show them off. The art scene extends into music as well, with operetta being very popular. Every year, the operetta societies in Liechtenstein (alternating between the cities of Vaduz and Balzers) organize on a comprehensive operetta season (what else would you expect from a bunch of ex-aristocrats?)

Winter sports is why Liechtenstein really shines as a tourist destination. The Alps provide fantastic opportunities for downhill skiing and snowboarding, and you'll find well-groomed cross-country trails. Recreation areas are concentrated in two regions: Malbun and Steg. Malbun is very well equipped, with six ski lifts, a toboggan run, and footpaths. I haven't been to Steg, but I've heard that it is similarly equipped.


If strange, borderline bloodthirsty German festivals are your cup of tea (and whose cup are they not?) you should try to be in town for Funkensonntag – literally "Spark Sunday." Every year, just before Easter, hordes of Liechtensteiners build large bonfires and burn witches made of straw on them. They claim that it merely harkens back to heathen ceremonies to drive away winter – so let that be a lesson to any witches out there: If you're in Liechtenstein, steal the sun at your own peril.

As you can see, Liechtenstein has a lot to offer, no matter the season. It's a great destination, and fun to see what has become of the old German aristocracy.

Next time: Luxembourg


Lovely Luxemburg

Another country that straddles the divide between two cultures, The Grand Duchy of Luxemburg is an interesting glimpse into what would happen if the French and Germans melded into one people, then spoke a language that neither could understand. Luxemburg is a very prosperous nation, having had in the past the world's highest GDP per capita, and one of the world's lowest unemployment rates.

Luxemburg has been at various times under French or German rule, and is very much a multilingual culture (good for tourists). While French is often used officially, most people natively speak Luxemburgish – an interesting conflagration of German and Dutch with some French thrown in for good measure. A large portion of the population speaks English.

Luxembourg has a number of UNESCO world heritage sites, including the entirely of Luxemburg City itself. If you like historic architecture, be sure to see the Abbaye de Neumunster, which was constructed in the 17th and 18th centuries, and subsequently fully restored.

There have been a disproportionate number of famous artists born in Luxemburg, including American photography pioneer Edward Steichen and expressionist painter Joseph Kutter. Because of this, you will find a wide variety of art galleries in Luxemburg, particularly in Clervaux.

You should also be sure to check out Luxemburgish cuisine: it's a fusion of Belgian Walloon cuisine (a lot of fish and game animals) and German (sauerkraut) with it's own unique touch (liver dumplings). The beer and wine scene in Luxemburg is most pleasing; the beer is Belgian in style, while the Moselle Valley produces fruity white wines that can be quite delicious.

While I didn't find as much to do in Luxemburg as, say, San Marino or Liechtenstein, it is still worth a visit. The people are friendly, the beer and wine are great, and you get to hear a rare language that you probably won't hear anywhere else in the world. Not too shabby!

Next: The Vatican


The Vatican

Famous for being the smallest nation in the world, Vatican City is home to the Pope and the highest per-capita crime rate in the world; I'm sure that the two are unrelated. It's not really a party town, but there are several parallels between the Vatican and an exclusive nightclub:

1. There are surely bouncers: The Vatican's exclusive gendarmes are the famous "Swiss Guards," who, like bouncers, don't take any crap and are often mal-adjusted (in 1998, on killed two people and killed himself).

2. There is a strict dress code. No short sleeved shirts, no excessive jewelry, and no attire sporting vulgar slogans. Also, remember ladies (and pudgy men): no cleavage.

3. It's always too crowded. The Vatican is a tourist hotspot because of St. Peter's Basilica and the Sistine Chapel. Get there early and off-season if you want to avoid the crowds.

The Vatican is the only site on the UNESCO world heritage list that consists of an entire country. Everyone has heard about St. Peter's Basilica and the Sistine Chapel, but you really have to see it in person to appreciate it. The works by Michelangelo and Botticelli are some of the finest artistic works in the history of humanity, and are must-sees for anyone who is even remotely interested in art. If you're a Catholic, Vatican City has a special significance for you, since it is here that all decisions regarding doctrine are made. Inscrutably popular, poorly written books by Dan Brown (which inflate the Vatican's control over the world) notwithstanding, It's really pretty amazing that such a tiny country can have a such a disproportionately huge influence on world events through its moral and spiritual authority alone.


The Vatican also has arguably the best and most efficient postal service in the world, to the point that Romans will drive to the Vatican to drop off international mail rather than mail locally from Italian postal boxes. If you need to mail anything, now is your chance.

Next Time: Malta

Anyone looking to read competant fiction about intrigue within the Catholic Church should pick up a copy of The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco

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